Folk and Traditional Song Lyrics:
Five Constipated Men

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Five Constipated Men

Five Constipated Men

     There were five, five, constipated men
     In the Bible, in the Bible
     There five, five, constipated men
     In the five books of Moses

The first, first, constipated man
Was Cain, he wasn't Abel
The first, first, constipated man
Was Cain, he wasn't Abel

     CHORUS

The second, second constipated man
Was Balaam, he couldn't move his ass
The second, second constipated man
Was Balaam, he couldn't move his ass

     CHORUS

The third, third, constipated man
Was Moses, he took two tablets
The third, third, constipated man
Was Moses, he took two tablets

     CHORUS

The fourth, fourth, constipated man
Was Solomon, he sat for forty years
The fourth, fourth, constipated man
Was Solomon, he sat for forty years

     CHORUS

The fifth, fifth constipated man
Was Samson, he brought the house down
The fifth, fifth constipated man
Was Samson, he brought the house down
     CHORUS

(actually, there were six:
The sixth, sixth constipated man
Was Titus. His name speaks for itself)
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From the singing of Carli Gewertz
DC
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