Don't look at me that way, stranger,
I didn't s*** in your seat.
I just come down from the mountains
With my balls all covered with sleet.
I've been up in the Lehigh Valley,
Me and my old pal, Lou,
A-pimpin' for a whorehouse
And a God damned good one too.
It was there that I first f***ed Nellie;
She was the village belle.
I was only a lowdown panderer
But I loved that girl like hell.
But along came a city slicker,
All handsome, gay and rich,
And he stole away my Nellie,
That stinking son-of-a-bitch.
I'm just restin' my ass a moment,
And then I'm on my way.
I'll hunt the runt that swiped my c***
If it takes till Judgement Day.