American Old Time Song Lyrics: 19 The Dude

Theater, Music-Hall, Nostalgic, Irish & Historic Old Songs, Volume 19

THE DUDE.
Recited by Matt. McElroy.

Between his pearly teeth a pick,
In his hand a little stick;
Pointed toes, yards of collar,
In his pocket half a dollar.
Spiko pants, color light,
Can't sit down-awful tight,
Very tired standing, 'fraid to squat,
Bust the stitches,
Awful noise over rending breeches.
Little Dudeen passes by,
Langtry bangs, heaves a sigh,
Sighs a smole, bobs her sash,
Mr. Dude makes a mash.
Dudeen's thirsty, Delmonico
So good water, lemon squash,
Eyes bewitching, smiles intense,
He don't smile-sixty cents.
Tries to borrow from the mash-
She turns red, nixey cash.
Sound is heard of bursting stitches.
Awful noise of rending breeches.
Girley faints, dude flops.
No more mashes. Curtain drops.