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The Old Monk 
The Old Monk 
There was an old monk of great reknown, There was an old monk of great reknown, There was an old monk of great reknown, He f***ed all the women in old London town. 
cho: The old sod, [the dirty old sod,]* The bugger deserves to die. [f*** him, let us pray,]* Glory, glory hallelujah. 
One day he met a maiden fair, (3x) And he lured her up into his lair. 
He took her to his marble halls,(3x) And he showed her his prick and his bloody great balls. 
He laid her on his fify-white bed, And he f***ed that girl until she was dead 
The other monks cried out "For Shame", So he turned her over and did it again. 
The other monks, to stop his frolics They took up a knife and cut off his bollicks. 
But on the resurrection morn, The dirty old bugger still had a horn. 
And so the old monk has gone to hell And we've heard he's f***ing the devil as well. 
* bracketed phrases spoken 
From Songs from the Front and Rear, Hopkins 
Note: In new York City, the chorus was (spoken gravely and with
 import:) The bastard. The dirty bastard. f*** 'im. s***. We-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-a-sel s***! RG