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The Cat

The Cat

All you that are married give ear to my song
It is of frolic that lately was done
By a young man and maid, if the truth I may tell
The sport was so pretty it pleased me well

By the light of a candle I happened to spy
A pretty young couple together did lie
Said Nelly to John if you'll pull up my smock
You'll find a young hen full as good as your cock

Then Johnny kissed her and pleased her awhile
When he pulled up her smock it made him to smile
Instead of a hen it appeared like a cat
For there was her beard and her rough hairy back

Then Nelly she opened her lily white thighs
John played with the cat till the bristle did rise
He stroked down the hair as black as a coal
She catched his finger right snap in her hole

Then Nelly she held him so fast in her arms
While John was enjoying her beautiful charms
He pushed in his dagger so stiff and so stout
Saying I'll kill the cat and I'll knock her brains out

A desperate battle between them was fought
And John kept knocking poor pussy about
The cat spit upon him and fought him so bo[l]d
That pussy beat him right out of her hole

The Nelly she held him so fast by the back
While she wriggled her ass & cried push it in Jack
He pushed in with courage so stout and so strong
She smiled in his face crying well done John

I burst in to laughter and spoiled the fun
But Nelly kept crying push it in John
Then John fell a laughing at Nell on her back
And swore he'd no more be plagued with a cat.

(anon, from a broadside in the Bodleian Ballad collection)

Not tune specified, but various well known tunes would fit. E.g. Villikins,
An alternative copy has [And she catched his pillock right slap in her hole] in
 verse 4. I didn't know of that meaning of pillock!

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