Showing Aunt Matilda 'Round the Town.
Copyright, 1197, by Francis, Day & Hunter.
Words and music by K. W. Rogers.
Aunt Matilda came to town only a week ago,
She had ne'er been there before, at the sights she cried, "Oh, Lor!"
She requested me the points of interest to show.
As she found the "oof," I couldn't well say no!
Regent Street and oxford Street I show'd her, you can bet,
Told her ev'ry lady was a Countess that we met;
Down the Strand the girls she eyed, said, "Who are they?" so quick;
"Daughters of our Clergymen," I answered in a tick!
She said, "To what church do they go?" I said, "St. Jim-jams, Pimlico
I've been showing my Aunt Matilda 'round the town,
Taking her down the street, you know, pointing her out the beauty show!
Come with me on a spree, sorrow and care we'll drown,
For Aunt has given me fifty pounds for showing her 'round the town.
In Trafalgar Square my aunt noticed the fountain there,
I said. "Yes, the ladies gay, come to bathe here ev'ry day!"
She felt thirsty, to a temp'rance bar said we'd repair.
So I took her to the "Cri, and she did stare:
She said, "Moet, what's that?" I said, "Sort of ginger beer!"
"What! ten shillings? Well, it's nice, but ain't it rather dear?"
At the Empire ballet girls she peep'd and said, "How rude:'
Till I told her they were fairies just come from the wood;
I said, "They're angels without wings!" She said, "I've read about
such things!" -Chorus.
Aunt Matilda drank so much of Moet's ginger beer.
While up in the town she stayed, that at last the poor old maid
In her poor old cranium began to feel so queer.
I said. "It's the air, Aunt, it's so strong up here!"
Back she went to Lincolnshire, as by the train I stood.
Aunt said, "Bert, here's fifty pounds, because you've been so good
In the missionary box I know you'll put the lot."
As I thank'd her, to myself I whisper'd, "Yes, p'rhaps not!"
To all the boys I've shown the "bright." and I am on a spree to-night.