American Old Time Song Lyrics: 48 I Never Could Understand

Theater, Music-Hall, Nostalgic, Irish & Historic Old Songs, Volume 48

Home Songster main V01 V02 V03 V04 V05 V06 V07 V08 V09 V10 V11 V12 V13 V14 V15 V16 V17 V18 V19 V20 V21 V22 V23 V24 V25 V26 V27 V28 V29 V30 V31 V32 V33 V34 V35 V36 V37 V38 V39 V40 V41 V42 V43 V44 V45 V46 V47 V48 V49 V50 V51 V52 V53 V54 V55 V56 V57 V58 V59 V60 V61 Support Search



Share page  Visit Us On FB


I NEVER COULD UNDERSTAND.
Copyright, 1895, by W. P. Chase.
Words and Music by W. P. Chase.

There are many strange things in the drama of life
Which I never could understand,
There are customs now ancient und customs still rife,
Which I never could understand;
For instance, you'll see a young man on the street,
All dressed in the latest style, looking so neat;
How he does it on salary of seven a week?
I never could understand,
I never could understand just why some things are so;
Ev'ry day of the year I find things more queer,
Things I never could understand.

Just why our bald heads always take the front row,
I never could understand,
And why living pictures are so much the "go,"
I never could understand.
Just why, when a baby wakes up In the night,
It takes such a ghoulish And fiendish delight
In making Its papa say things which aren't right,
I never could understand.

How the ballet can make our old maids look so young,
I never could understand;
Why a few dozen more of book agents aren't hung,
I never could understand.
Just why, when a woman Is out In the wet,
And raises her skirt just a wee little bit,
All men will endeavor a clear sight to get-
I never could understand.

Just why men from Kansas refuse to wear socks,
I never could understand;
Why Hebrews get mad when you yell "Sheenie Mox,"
I never could understand.
The women are wielding a powerful pen,
Declaring all work should be open to them;
But why they insist that typewriters be men,
I never could understand.

Why "Hubble" won't eat when his wife makes the bread,
I never could understand;
Why an Irishman so loves to hit at a head,
I never could understand.
Why kissing's considered so awful a sin.
Why Willie, when feeling her breath on his chin,
Will get so frustrated when papa steps in,
I never could understand.

Why plumbers are never admitted in Heaven,
I never could understand;
Why bull dogs are always so hungry at 'leven,
I never could understand.
One night I had been with my girl to a dance;
We were parting, when suddenly I caught a glance
Of doggie-just why he so fancied my pants,
I never could understand.

How aldermen always grow wealthy so quick,
I never could understand;
Why the first cigar makes a young man, oh, so sick,
I never could understand.
Why the bicycle riders assume such a hump,
Why the mother-in-law is considered a chump.

Why a man like Jim Weaver e'er took to the stump,
I never could understand.

Why the Mayor of this city wears three-dollar pants,
I never could understand;
Why a woman goes shopping with only ten cents
I never could understand.
She'll enter the door in a millionaire way,
Price laces and velvets, and hours will stay,
Then tell them she'll come again some other day­She's a thing I can not understand.
Download music lyrics PDF file For Printing with (no ads)
Download music lyrics in RTF file For editing / printing with Word and other editing software.
Download music lyrics as PNG Graphic file For inclusion in DTP etc.






E-Book - An Annotated Compendium of Old Time American Songs by James Alverson III