American Old Time Song Lyrics: 46 What Would The Congregation Say
Theater, Music-Hall, Nostalgic, Irish & Historic Old Songs, Volume 46
What Would the Congregation Say?
Copyright, 1894. by Spaulding & Gray.
Words and Music by Barney Fagau.
A young man intent on an innocent prank,
Invitingly ventured to say,
"If I'd a companion I'd look about town
In a prudent sort of a way;
I've an evening to spare, no appointment to keep,
And nothing important in view."
While thus ruminating a clerical gentleman
Said to him, "How do you do?"
He turned and beheld, with) a look of surprise,
A chum of his college days-
The sun never shone that could equal the smile
That lit up his startled gaze.
Not thinking, he shouted "Let's go for a lark,"
Overlooking his friend's attire.
His reverence said, with a horrified look,
I have really no such desire.
Refrain.
'What would the congregation say?
Dreadfully they would talk,
They'd think I had strayed from the virtuous path,
And they'd never get over the shock;
Your proposal is very ill-timed,
Excuse me, I bid you good-day,
If I entertained it a moment, . "
What would the congregation say?"
Abashed at the flagrant mistake he had made
He cudgeled his brain for a while,
Resuming with perfect composure, remarked.
With a broad, significant smile,
'Sir, the very fastidious pick of your
congregation would never object.
Nor could they accuse you of harboring thoughts
That betoken a luck of respect."
The curate, with interest, listened and said,
"I prithee I do no harm "-
The tempter was certainly doing his work;
They're sauntering arm in arm;
Observing a cab, they secured it, got in,
Then quickly they sped along.
The reverend man, with conviction, remarking,
"If I should be doing wrong-
Refrain.
"What would the congregation say?
Dreadfully they would talk;
To think I would stray from the virtuous path,
They would never get over the shock.
Your proposal is very ill-timed,
Allow me to bid you good-day;
If I entertain it a moment,
What will the congregation say?
They stopped, then alighted, and entering,
Soon took ev'rything in at a glance,
Where fashion and beauty delightfully tripped
To the strains of exquisite dance.
When the parson, annoyed at the sights he beheld,
Attempted a hasty retreat,
A charming young miss, intercepting him, said,
Won't you dance?" in a tone soft and sweet.
She wouldn't take "No" for an answer,
And now they're dancing, and no mistake;
Excited, his heart beats a hurried tat-too,
His knees they begin to shake.
He soon forgets everything, while the dear girl
At ease on his arm does rest;
At last it occurs to him, while he Is holding her
Lovingly to his breast-(Repeat second refrain.)
The dancing was finished, the lady proposed,
They both have a glass of champagne;
'Twas very embarrassing, all his apologies
They were uttered in vain;
He reluctantly sipped till the telling effect
Impossible 'twas to conceal-
So smitten was he with her delicate charms,
Every thought from his mind seemed to steal.
Espying his silken chapeau, with a smile
Politely to him she said,
"I'll show you how active a lady can be,
Just hold that above your head";
Unwittingly he then positioned himself,
Regretting it after that;
The athletic miss, with a laugh, put her foot through
The crown of his reverend hat.
Refrain.
What will the congregation say?
Dreadfully they will talk,
To think I would stray from the virtuous path,
They will never get over the shock.
Regaining his senses, out into the street
He hurriedly made his way.
If ever they learn the particulars,
What will the congregation say?