American Old Time Song Lyrics: 45 Three Chapters
Theater, Music-Hall, Nostalgic, Irish & Historic Old Songs, Volume 45
Copyright, 1894, by T. B. Harms & Co.
Words by Walter De Frece.
Music by Charles E. Pratt and Walter De Frece.
Two dear old chums, who had been pals since they were college boys,
And never parted all their lives, dividing cares and joys,
Once suddenly discovered that they're drifting far apart.
For gay nights seem to vanish, and the old larks never start.
They meet, and Bill says, "Hurry, how is it you are so scarce?
The people think we've had a row, or may be something worse."
Then Harry, with a knowing wink, says, "I'm all right, old pal."
And Bill at once surmises that the trouble is a gal.
"So you're smitten?" "Just a little." "Is she pretty?" "Stand's alone;
She's the dandy of the lot. I mean to say."
"Any figure?" "Like a Venus." "And her shape is?" "All her own;
You couldn't find her equal, anyway."
Instead of going to his club, to meet his old pal, Bill,
Each night finds Harry shaved and dress'd with care, quite restless 'till
The church clock chimes the hour, which tells a visit tie must pay.
To see the charmer who has drawn him from his Club away.
Observe him as he nervously approaches her street door;
A bashful knock, a hurried shake, to fix himself before.
He hears a step approaching, and the servant girl appears,
And then this conversation there one generally bears:
"Evening, Mary; I'm a nuisance!" "Master's out." "Oh, is Miss Kate?"
"Guess not much, while you're about, sir, I should say."
"In the parlor?" "No, she's dressing." "Oh, then, thanks, I'd better wait."
You bet your boots that Harry's come to stay.
The years roll by, and changes come, as changes always will,
And once again, by chance, our hero meets his old pal, Bill,
But what a change, for Hurry has not found a fitting mate,
Whilst Bill has lived contented, in a happy married state.
"Comparisons are odious," but oh, it Is so strange,
For Bill is bright and lively still, in Harry, there's a change.
But o'er a glass they sit and chat, and think of by-gone days;
It's a novel in a nutshell, too, as Bill to Harry says:
"So you're married?" "Yes, I'm married." "And you're happy?"
"Well, so so." "And the wife's well?" "When I left her yesterday."
"Any children?" "Four-and beauties." "You are lucky; one more drink."
"The wife objects to more than one a day."