I Am a Highly Educated Man.
Copyright, 1894, by The S. Brainard's Sons Co.
Words by Harry C. Clyde. Music by H. C. Verner.
I was born about four thousand years ago.
And there's nothing ever happened I don't know;
I saw old king Pharaoh's daughter finding Moses in the water,
And I'll whip the man that says it isn't so.
I saw Noah when he built, the famous ark;
I sneaked into it one night when it was dark;
I saw Jonah eat the whale, and I pulled the lion's tail,
And I crossed the land of Canaan on a lark.
I am a highly educated man, to keep my brains within my hat I plan;
I have been on earth so Ions: that I used to sing this song,
While Abraham And Isaac rushed the can.
I saw Satan when he searched the garden o'er,
I saw Eve and Adam driven from the door;
While the apple they were eating 'round the bushes I was beating,
I can prove that I'm the man that ate the core.
I was there when Cain slew Abel in the glade,
And I know the game was Poker that they played:
So right there is the rub, did he kill him with a club?
I am sure it was a diamond or a spade.-Refrain.
Queen Elizabeth was dead in love with me,
We were married in Milwaukee secretly;
But I schemed around and shook her, and I went with General Hooker
To fight mosquitoes down in Tennessee.
I've sat with hinge and queens on either hand,
And jacks and aces too, you understand;
I've seen an auction "sale "on the water in the gale,
And I've seen a schooner drunk upon dry land.-Refrain.
I remember when this country had a king,
I've seen Cleopatra pawn her wedding-ring;
I saw Ireland's colors flying when George Washington stopped lying
On the day when Putti first began to sing.
I taught Solomon his little A, B, C's.
I helped Brigham Young invent Limburger cheese:
I was sailing on the bay with Methuselah one day
And I saved his flowing whiskers from the breeze.-Refrain.