As homeward comes the married man,
He's met by wife at door,
With fond embrace And loving kiss,
And-" Baby's throat is sore!
"And did you think to stop at Brown's,
And get that marabout
I ordered yesterday?-And, dear,
Fred's boots are all worn out!
"I'm glad you are so early, John,
So much I miss you dearI've had a letter from mamma;
She's coming to live here.
"How very glad you look, dear John,
I knew that you would be-
The flour's out. the butter, and
You must send home some tea.
"That plumber has been here again-
If you don't pay he'll sue;
And Mr. Pendergast called in
To say your rent was due.
'Fred's trousers are half cotton, John,
You thought they were all wool-
Oh! that reminds me that your son
Was whipped to-day at school.
*' The roof has leaked and spoiled the rugs
Upon the upper hall;
And Jane must go, the careless thing,
She let the mirror fall.
"To-day, as she was moving it
(The largest one, dear John),
Of course it broke; it also broke
The lamp it fell upon.
"What makes you look so grave, my love?
Take off your things and wipe
Your feet-and only think, to-day
Jane broke your meerschaum pipe.
"O, John! that horrid, horrid word!
You do not love me, dear;
I wish that I-boo-hoo-were deadYou're cross as any bear."