American Old Time Song Lyrics: 05 The Dude
Theater, Music-Hall, Nostalgic, Irish & Historic Old Songs, Volume 5
Who strolls the Ave. each afternoon;
Who whistles airs all out of tune;
And dons short coats cut quite too " soon '"!
Observe his form.. You can, for he
Wears pants aa tight as tight can be(And pants for notoriety)--
Who's stiff as statue cut in wood;
Can't bend, and wouldn t if he could:
A sort of nothing 'twixt the bad and good?
Who wears his hair all nice and banged,
And says, " By Jove, that Mrs. LangtRy's
chawming quite, or I'll be hanged"?
Who drives a tandem through the park,
Says, "Life's, aw, such a jolly lark"
(Perhaps the Dude's the long-songht " Snark ")?
Who goes to all receptions, teas;
Who smirks a smile at friends he sees,
And, for his health, sips saugarees?
Who dresses in the latest style,
Declares: " The weathah's thimply vile,"
And lisps some dainty swear, the while?
Who's neither fool, nor knave, nor sage,
This funny speck on nature's page-
Conundrum of the modern age?
Who. then, can work the puzzle through-
Tell what it's for-what it can do?
Guess what it is, I'll give it you.