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If I Had a Shiny Gun

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If I Had a Shiny Gun

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If I Had a Shiny Gun
(Dorothy Parker)

If I had a shiny gun,
I could have a world of fun
Putting bullets through the brain
Of the folks that give me pain.

If I had some poison gas,
I could make the moments pass
Bumping off a number of
People whom I do not love.

But I have no lethal weapon
So does fate our pleasure step on.
And they are alive and well,
Who should be, by rights, In Hell.

Note: I sing the to Hark! The Herald Angels Sing. RG
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