In the Town of Ballybay
In the town of Ballybay, there was a lassie dwellin,'
I knew her very well and her story's wortha-tellin.'
Her father kept a still and he was a good distiller,
But when it came to drink, sure the devil wouldn't fill her.
And she had a wooden leg that was hollow down the middle
She used to tie a string and she'd play it like a fiddle.
She'd fiddle in the hall, she'd fiddle in the alleyway,
She didn't give a ----, she had to fiddle anyway.
And she said she couldn't dance unless she had her Wellies* on,
But when she had 'em on she would dance as well as anyone.
She wouldn't go to bed unless she had her shimmie on,
But when she had it on she would go as quick as anyone.
She had lovers by the score, every Tom and Dick and Harry,
She was courted night and day, but still she wouldn't marry.
And then she fell in love with fellow with a stammer,
When he tried to run away, she hit him with a hammer.
She had children up the stairs, she had children in the byre**
And another ten or twelve sittin' rottin' by the fire.
She fed 'em on potatoes, and soup she made with nettles,
And lumps of hairy bacon that she boiled up in the kettle.
So she led a sheltered life, eating porridge and black puddin,'
She terrorized her man, until he died right sudden.
And when the husband died, she was feelin' very sorry
So she rolled him in a bag and she threw him in the quarry