The Sandhill Monkey
A story aw's gaun for to tell,
An' t' ye it may luik varry strange,
It was in a shop on the Sandhill,
When the Craw's Nest was on the Exchange.
A monkey was each day drest soon,
Ahint the coonter he sat i' the shop,
Whe cam in an' their money laid doon,
Jaco straight in the till would it pop
Rum ti iddity, &c
A Skipper he cam in yen day,
He coudent help luiking at Jackey,
On the counter his money did lay,
Saying, Please, sir, an ounce of rag backey!
His money Jack popt in the till,
The Skipper kept luiking at him,
A' the time on his seat he sat still,
And he luik'd at the Skipper quite grim.
Now pray, sir, will ye bear a hand?
For aw maun be at Sheels now this tide--
Now pray be as sharp as ye can,
For wor keel she is at the Keyside;--
Au'd man, are ye deef? then he cried,
An' intiv a passion hefell,
On the counter lay some ready weigh'd
Says he, Smash! but aw'll help mysel!
Then he tuik up an ounce o' rag backey,
But afore he cud get turn'd about,
Off his seat then up started au'd Jackey,
An' cathc'd him hard fast by the snout;
He roar'd and he shouted out Murder!
The Maister he see'd a' the fun,
Not wishing the joke to gan farther,
Straight intiv the shop then he run.
What's the matter, my canny good man?
An' he scarcely could keep in the laugh;
Take this au'd man off me--bear a hand!
For aw think now that's mater aneuf--
What's the mateer, ye ax?--Smash! that's funny!
(An' he still kept his eye upon Jackey)
Aw' paid yoiur grandfayther the money,
But he'll not let me hae me backey.
No mind ye, maw canny good man,
If ever thou cums in wor keel,
For the trick thou hes play'd me the day,
Wor Pee Dee shall sobble ye weel;
Eh, for a' yor fine claes I'll engage,
An' for a' ye're a sturdy au'd man,
Tho' he's nobbut twelve years of age,
He shall thresh ye till ye canna gan.
In: The Newcastle Song Book or Tyne-Side Songster., W&T Fordyce
Newcastle Upon Tyne.