Folk and Traditional Song Lyrics:
Plastic Jesus(2)

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Plastic Jesus (2)

Plastic Jesus (2)

Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations,
We will travel every nation,
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far.

cho:  Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
      Riding on the dashboard of my car
      Through all trials and tribulations,
      We will travel every nation,
      With my plastic Jesus I'll go far.

I don't care if it's dark or scary,
Long as I have magnetic Mary,
Ridin' on the dashboard of my car,
I feel I'm protected amply,
I've got the whole damn Holy Family,
Riding on the dashboard of my car.

No, I don't care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus,
Riding on the dashboard of my car,
But I think he'll have to go,
His magnet ruins my radio,
And if we have a wreck he'll leave a scar.

I don't care if it bumps or jostles
Long as I got the Twelve Apostles
Bolted to the dashboard of my car
Don't I have a pious mess
Such a crowd of holiness
Strung across the dashboard of my car

God made Christ a Holy Jew
God made Him a Christian too
Paradoxes populate my car
Joseph beams with a feigned elan
From the shaggy dash of my furlined van
Famous cuckold in the master plan;

Naughty Mary, smug and smiling,
Jesus dainty and beguiling
Knee-deep in the piling of my van;
His message clear by night or day
My phosphorescent plastic Gay
Simpering from the dashboard of my van.

When I'm goin' fornicatin'
I got my ceramic Satan
Sinnin' on the dashboard of my Winnebago Motor Home
The women know I'm on the level
Thanks to the wild-eyed stoneware devil
Ridin' on the dashboard of my ...
      Sneerin' from the dashboard of my ...
      Leering from the dashboard of my van.

If I weave around at night
And the police think I'm tight,
They'll never find my bottle, though they ask;
plastic Jesus shelters me,
For His head comes off, you see--
He's hollow, and I use Him for a flask.

      Plastic Jesus, plastic Jesus
      Riding on the dashboard of my car:
      Ride with me and have a dram,
      Of the blood of the Lamb,
      Plastic Jesus is a holy bar.

SW
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