1. Aa'll sing you a song if ye'll patiently wait
Aboot a grand supper there's been at Streetgate,
Te eat this grand supper, there only was two
But they ate a whole hedgehog, some bacon and coo
cho: Singing fal-de-ral laddy, sing fal-de-ral day
Fal-de-ral laddy, sing fal-de-ral day
2. There's a chap in the neighbourhood has a small dog,
One day went oot walkin' and it catched a hedgehog
So te have a bit fun with the prize that they'd got
He thowt tiv hissel he wad take it to Stott.
3. When he took it to Stott, they arranged what to dee,
Wi' Kingey and Barbour they aalways made free:
Everytime they went, they were hungry and dry
So just for a lark they wad make them a pie.
4. Noo it had to be killed before starting to skin't,
So they took up a mell for te knock oot its wind,
Them that was present, tha roared and tha laughed;
The chap missed the hedgehog an he broke the mellshaft.
5. The mell was ne use so they took a sharp knife,
Detarmined to take awa Proggley's life
They tried for te kill him in two diff'rent ways
So they had te droon it for te finish his days.
6. The landlady's sister made up a pie crust
With the best of beef fat and some dumplin' dust
She nicked it aal roond, made it tender and then
The oven was hot, so she put the pie in.
7. Noo, Barbour and Kingey sat winkin' their eye
And wishin' they only could get a bit pie;
They were watchin' the mistress instead of their gill -
The smell was that nice, they could hardly keep still.
8. Tom the butcher te suit them, soon found oot a plan,
He says, "Drink off your gills, be as sharp as ye can:
Gan intae the meathoose an' let aal things by
And aa'll watch the mistress and steal you the pie!"
9. In the meathoose they only had been a short while
When they saa the pie comin' and they started te smile:
Tom says, "Get it eaten; 'twas fettled for Stott,
If he comes, he'll gan mad" Kingey says,"Man, it's hot"
9. Noo to get the pie eaten, they both wired in
Till the gravy ran of baith their noses and chin.
When Stott showed the skin of the pie that they had,
They looked at each other, an' they torned very bad.
10. Says Barbour to Kingey, "Jack, I wadn't care
But proggles come noo where there used to be hair:
Aa bowt a hard hat an' aa've tied it tight doon,
But the proggles come faster and they've went through the croon!"
11. A razor's ne use: they both shave with a saw
Like icicles falling, they drop from their jaw:
Barbour's in trouble but Kingey far worse -
He cannot lie doon or sit on his arse!
by Tommy Armstrong, on "Tommy Armstrong [1848-1919]: The Great Balladeer
of the Coalfields" (Topic).