In olden days, how well a fella feeled,
Now they're not well in Sellarfield, and it shows.
Nowadays your humble peasant is,
Likely to be fluorescent, from head to toes.
One hundred watts, they say,
You can spot today,
Every male today,
In Winscale today,
And the tramps today,
Are like lamps today,
With an incandescent nose.
Parsons, Priests and Monks and Deacons,
All look like Belisha Beacons, They say "God Knows !"
Plutocrats don't have plutonium,
They leave those Vats of Odium to the proles.
Acid rain and radiation,
Our gifts to other nations, both friend and foes.
In the West today,
We fluoresce today,
And the rain today,
Rots your brain today,
And the Manx today,
Don't give thanks today,
For the waste that we dispose.
Cows that once just ruminated,
Are now illuminated from head to toes.
On the hills the sheep are numerous,
Shining in their illuminous sheepskin clothes.
On the hills and mountain passes,
Sheepdogs all wear dark glasses, perched on their nose.
The sheep today,
They may sleep today,
But their sleep today,
Is not deep today,
For the night today,
Is too bright today,
And they've all got extra toes.
Why is there this sense of doom in us,
Must be because we're luminous, I suppose.
Tune:Anything Goes - Cole Porter