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American Ballads and Folk Songs
I saw Cain and Abel playing in the glade, And I'm sure that it was poker that they playedj
But here's the litde rub,
Did he hit him with a Club? I'm sure it was a Diamond or a Spade.
I was there when Noah built his famous ark, And I crawled in through a window after dark.
I saw Jonah eat the whale,
Daniel twist the lion's tail, And I crossed the land of Canaan on a lark.
I saw Solomon and all his wives so fair, I saw Absalom left hanging by the hair.
And when I saved King David's life,
And he offered me a wife, I said, "Now you're talking business, have a chair.**
I saw Pharaoh being pestered by the fleas,
I helped Brigham Young invent Limburger cheese,
And when sailing down the bay
With Methuselah one day I saved his flowing whiskers in the breeze.
I was there when Alexander crossed the sea, And I always cheered him on to victory—
And when King Darius died,
I was fighting by his side, So he gave his horse and chariot to me.
Oh, I'm the man who built the Parthenon, At which Euripides said, "Well, I swan!"
And I used to serve pink teas,
For my friend Praxiteles— While Pilate served us from his demijohn,